One of the longest days of my life...

On Wednesday, July 29, I put my 18 year old son on a plane and sent him to Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri.

The day actually started on Tuesday. I knew we were down to the wire and I wasn't about to miss one, single minute with Blaine. But I did. Blaine left for Columbus on Tuesday afternoon with his best friend and their respective girlfriends. The plan was for my husband and I to meet up with them and go to dinner. Then my dad wanted to go. Well, everybody got there before me. I was late getting out of work, the kids were hungry and didn't want to wait, my dad was there 30 minutes before us and my husband just couldn't drive fast enough to get me there! Dad convinced the kids to wait for dinner so we quickly checked into the hotel and headed to...Bob Evans. That's right, I said Bob Evans. The child could go just about anywhere he wanted and he picked BOB EVANS!!! It's alright, he couldn't eat anyway!

After dinner, we headed back to the hotel to visit with Blaine for a little while before he had to be back in his room. He was evidently getting tired of my tears and he informed me that I needed to "mom up!" Easier said than done...He had to be in his room by 11 pm and had a 4 am wake-up call. I made him promise to call me and wake me! I tried to go to bed. I lay awake thinking while my husband was snoring away. At about 12:30, I was texting my daughter, talking about her brother and finally forced myself to sleep a little after 1 a.m.

At 4:15 am, I woke up and sent him a text message..."did you forget something?" No response. Another text..."I don't see you at breakfast." No response. At 4:40 am, I received a reply..."I'm on my way." I had gotten up before he did! By 5 am, we could see him sitting down, again not eating, but tapping his foot up and down. He was nervous, but he wasn't about to let me know he was.

The bus took them to MEPS about 5:15, I finally was able to get back to sleep for a little while, but we were up and out of the hotel, on our way to MEPS by 7:45! So we could wait. Blaine was in a briefing when we got there, he came out, sat down and was immediately taken into another room.

As I looked around, I saw a lot of kids but very few families. I watched one young man walk into the room full of round tables filled with families and take a seat by himself. He looked around, obviously not seeing any familiar faces and then he made a phone call. I could only imagine what he must be feeling.

While we waited, I was trying to occupy my mind with other thoughts, but the tears just washed over me in waves. Then I'd chuckle to myself as I'd notice things like the fact that almost all the boys seemed to have the same haircut. Now, some of these kids had been up since 4 am and they were starting to show the signs...yawning, stretching, fidgeting. They all wore "stickers" with their names and a bar code and other cryptic information, they looked like overgrown kindergartners with notes pinned to their backs! More parents started to arrive, seemingly at the last minute.

Then Blaine came back out, this time, with a red paper in his hand. I knew what the red paper meant. It meant that he was going into one more briefing, then we would be called in to witness the swearing in. I was ready for it. I had my camera in hand, waiting near the door so that when they called, I could position myself for a really good photo of the whole thing. However, I was not prepared for what I saw...as I walked in, the double doors were opened to a room where approximately 20 young men stood at parade rest, thumbs crossed behind their backs in front of red curtains that reach from the ceiling to the floor, blue carpet and flags flanked the sides of the room. I stopped for a moment and the wave swept over me again. I caught my breath and was able to take a photo or two. They allowed us into the room to take photos and video the whole thing. The young lady that administered the oath was, ironically, from Ohio. She gave a great speech to the group about the importance of contact with your soldier. About care packages and showing your support. She then administered the oath, more tears, and the dismissed the new recruits so that they could sign their contracts.

At this point, we were instructed that at 10:30 am, we would all have to leave MEPS. There would be more instruction for our soldiers and they would meet us a the airport around noon. We were given directions to go to the airport and wait at the USO office. Now, I'm not a frequent flier, but I've never noticed a USO office at the airport. You can be sure I'll be looking for them from now on!

As we sat in the USO office, I looked around at the old photos on the wall. This is what I think of when I think USO. I could hear the Glenn Miller Orchestra playing Moonlight Serenade in my mind as I took in the photos from the WWII era. They had refreshments, games and classic game shows on the TV. A soldier arrived, apparently waiting for his plane to another destination. I chatted with another mother and then our kids started to arrive, excuse me, our soldiers started to arrive. Blaine informed us that his flight was scheduled for 3:45 pm.

One nice thing, they allowed us, all five of us, to accompany Blaine right to his gate. They issued passes at the ticket counter for each of us to get through security. Remind me to thank American Airlines for that!!! Airport security is a little different than I remember. I was a little apprehensive to pass my digital camera through their X-ray machine, but they assured me it would be fine. The biggest hang-up was with John's steel toed boots. Even though we explained to the "checker" that they were indeed steel toed boots, he felt it necessary to run them through again! LOL

We waited for what seemed like an eternity on his plane to arrive. You could tell that the waiting was getting to him. I got a few minutes to take him aside and tell him just how proud of him that I was, at least I tried to explain that while I was sobbing like a little girl. Blaine has always been one to memorize movie lines and interject them into a situation - today was no exception, today it was Fletch. The little boy in him came out and asked for Reese's Pieces and something to drink on the plane. The mom in me wanted to hold his hand. But, he's too busy holding hands with his girlfriend. That's an internal struggle...

Then, the plane arrived. NO! NOT YET! I'M NOT READY!!! He handed out the last hugs and kisses for a while and anxiously boarded his flight. All day, it had been rainy, overcast and cloudy. After we watched him disappear down the tunnel to the plane, I noticed that the sun had come out. That was a good sign, right? We stood, watching out the window as other passengers boarded the plane and they went through their pre-flight check..."Joey, do you like Gladiator movies..." I hear John say, it broke the mood and I must admit I laughed out loud.

We waited for the plane to taxi down the runway and disappear into the clouds....

I'm so proud of my soldier, but boy do I miss him

And so it begins...

(this was taken from a post that I made on June 7, the day after my son graduated)

Today was one of the toughest days so far. You see, my son graduated yesterday. It was a busy day with lots going on so I really didn't have all that much time to myself. But today was a different story...

Back in November, my son told me that he'd decided to join the Army. Now please, don't take anything that I am about to say to mean that I am not proud of him or that I don't want him to join the Army, instead this is all written from the viewpoint of a mom who has never been that far away from any of her children.

You see, up until this point, it's been this far off thing. He's not leaving until after he graduates. That was a while back. Now, he's graduated and I'm staring straight into the face of the fact that in a few short weeks, my son will be moving 900 miles from home and someone else will be looking after him. I won't be able to pick up the phone any time I want and just say "Hey! What are you doing?" Instead, I'll be wondering every day what he's doing. If he's happy. If he's sad. If he's lonely.

I've decided that I'm going to make sure he has a piece of mail in his hands every day! Just so he knows that we're all thinking of him every day. And I will be once again counting down the days until I will be able to see him again. Even if its only for a few days as he graduates from boot camp.

I know he'll change. This boy that I know will become a man under someone else's guidance. He will learn things that it's probably better that mom doesn't know that he knows. But every day I will wonder.

Is he getting enough to eat? Is he sleeping alright? Is he scared?

You see, I won't be able to sit by his bed while he sleeps and just listen to him breath like I did when he was little. I won't sit and cry and pray that God gives me the strength to get through the next day with this very busy little boy. Instead I will pray that he's not sad, or lonely or scared. But on those days or nights that he is, that God gives him the strength to get through the next day.

I will also look to my new friends, like yourselves, who are going through the very same things or those of you who have already been through these things.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. And little did I know what would happen on that day while on Facebook, I decided to look for other parents with children in the military and found this group. It could have been any group, but it was this one.

That I would make such fast friends with Val and Cindy who both have sons that are or were MP's. Which is completely ironic since my son is going to be an MP as well. That as we chatted back and forth, we would uncover so many similarities in our lives besides the bond we shared as military moms. I am so thankful for these women who have touched my life in so many ways already and my son hasn't even left the house.

So all you seasoned veterans out there, I'm gonna need you. I'm gonna need you tell me it's going to be OK. That I'll get through this. And after a while, when new people join us, I'll be there for them too. Maybe by then, I'll be OK.

God bless our children for the choices that they've made. I would love to hear from any of you at any time! Even if it's just to share a little of your own worries.

This is how it started...

Wow! Never thought I'd hear one of my kids tell me that. What do you do? You bite your lip, fake a smile and tell them how proud you are while your stomach is churning and you just want to scream, NO! You know it's something to be proud of but you just can't imagine the thought of your little boy, because that's what he is, dressed in that uniform putting his life on the line to protect our country.

Then you kind of chuckle. It's a nervous chuckle...wait a minute...my kid wants to protect this country? This is the same kid that leaves his underwear on the bathroom floor. The wet towel on the bed. The same kid that can't manage to get the candy wrapper, banana peel or dinner plate from his room to the kitchen and we're going to be counting on him to protect our country?! Oh yeah, the kid that has a come-back for everything, the kid that can quote a movie line at just the right moment from something he saw five years ago! Maybe I should stop feeling sorry for myself and start worrying about the Army!

This isn't what has my child gotten himself into, this is what has the Army gotten itself into!

But then, that mom thing takes over and you just want to cry. He's never been away from home for that long! But he says he's not worried about it. He says "I wasn't even nervous." Is that supposed to make me feel better? Then he tries to make me laugh. "Just think mom, 5 years of free haircuts." You laugh, then it hits you...did he just say FIVE YEARS?! He tells you don't worry, he'll write. Remember trying to get him to do thank you notes?! Yeah, he'll write. He may not, but I will.

Some days are good, some days aren't...He's still that little boy with the flat-top haircut and muscle man pose. Maybe that haircut was a glimpse at things to come. He's going to graduate and leave me. I'm selfish. I don't want him to go...